It can be all too easy to unconsciously define ourselves by our careers. I'm a "doctor," an "artist," a "founder," an "engineer"...
In a lot of ways our careers do reflect a lot about who we are and can give us an incredible amount of personal purpose. But at the end of the day, you are not an [insert role]. You are [insert name].
Why are you where you are today?
The very first journaling exercise I have people in my Intentional Careering program do is answer: Why are you where you are today?
Sounds simple right? But have you really thought deeply about it? Is where you are today a result of intentional action, or lack of action? What choices along the way did you make with the best information you had, or the best intentions you had at the time? And if you're feeling unsatisfied, why? What part of you is confused? What answers are you still looking for?
Seeing yourself as you actually are
“Some people spend their whole lives in love with the idea of who a person could become, and fail to see who they are.” - Mark Groves
I think this actually goes two ways...So often when we date people for their "potential," we miss seeing and wholeheartedly loving who they are - inside and out - as they are. If we are not willing to do that, then we simply aren't in the right relationship in the first place.
Emotions in a day
Have you ever been kinda annoyed at the people (let's be real, probably including me) who always tell you "nothing is permanent"? Ok, maybe it's just me...but honestly, when you're feeling a certain way (sad, anxious, lonely...) it can be so hard to think of it changing anytime soon. That is, until you actually watch it happen...
Try it: Keep a log of all of your emotions or moods throughout the day today. Set a timer, check in once every hour or so, and write down how you currently feel.
You don't need to analyze it or try and figure out where you were and what you were doing that caused a certain emotion (certainly extra credit if you want!) You simply need to notice. How did your emotions change - how did they flow in and flow out - throughout the day?
Next time you're dealing with a difficult emotion, does reminding yourself that it's not permanent feel any different? Can you embrace the more challenging emotions as part of a full palette of paint? 🎨
Disclaimer: While occasionally I include research and insights from my graduate classes in clinical psychology on my blog, I am not at this time a licensed therapist or mental health provider and therefore no content on this blog or website should not be considered or serve as replacement for therapeutic advice.